Today I’m writing about 2 of my mantras:
1. What you put out comes back all the time.
2. Worrying is wasted time. Use the same energy for doing something about whatever worries you.
The energy that you put into the world will come back to you. Some know this as Newton's third law of motion and others call it karma. The consequences in your life are much of the time born from what you do and how you behave.
A couple of months ago I was in my chiropractors office and after a quick “Hi, how are you?” he said to me “Every time I ask how you're doing you say "great!". Are you always like this?” I smiled and thought for a moment. I explained to him that I tend to have a baseline of contentment and I realize how lucky I am to be fairly even-tempered. I am always happy to connect with people and I genuinely want to know how they are so I start with friendliness in almost all situations.
But it's not that simple. This attitude is in part due to my being introverted. When I go out into the world, I choose to connect. I have the energy to connect because I give myself plenty of quiet time to refuel and balance myself out. But there’s more to this. More than I shared with him that day.
Almost all of my interactions with people are pleasant. But there’s a huge step involved here. When stressful or emotionally taxing things happen in my life, I choose to talk about them ONLY so much that I gain clarity and avoid wallowing. Instead I mainly focus on doing something about them. As a result, I don’t tend to carry the weight of something negative in my life into my interactions with others. It’s not their burden and I always try to be responsible for the energy I bring into someone’s space. I don't always nail it, and some days I fail terribly at being warm and kind, but I try. It tends to help both their day and mine.
Perspective is huge here. There is no good karma or bad karma. There’s just karma. Many stressful experiences are eventually enormous moments of clarity and growth. We all want it easy but when we are thrown into a tough situation we must handle, we can at least try and walk away from it a little better. Maybe even a little wiser. And that is a choice. Through the discomfort it is a constant choice to seek the positive and find gratitude for even the tiniest little thing.
The more we resist what is coming at us the more we push away the gifts up ahead. We get annoyed that we aren’t getting what we want out the experience instead of accepting what is and moving with it. Being with it and then putting out into the world our best foot and attempting to ride it out with grace, integrity, and calm. When we do, those tend to come back to us. I bet you can think of a time when it did. Can you think of a time when you actually chose to think positively during a stressful time and things began to change for the better?
We are all responsible for the energy we put into the world. As humans, our actions and reactions are constantly affecting one another. Being unaware and selfish may very well create a negative experience in someone else simply by being in the same room. Bringing a smile and warmth, whether we can tell or not, will absolutely have an impact on those around you.
Science proves that altruism is a large part of why we're still here, that empathy is in our biology. The way we treat each other, the way we see life, the way we think of the world around us; it matters tremendously. Acts and thoughts of separation and division will create more and more of the same.
When you do something loving, when you hold and send out positive energy, you simply feel happier. This is how we are wired. The intention of karma is not to put out positive energy in order to get some back. The goal is to put out positive energy and feel positive about your life. That's where the good work is. That's why the true revolution is a personal revolution. This is part of why Larkspur is offering Women's Retreats. It starts with one person and spreads like wild.
Give it a shot. I know some days are awful and not worth the effort but try and make the best choice you can for yourself and see what happens.
By Allison Barnard ACC, CPC
Allison Barnard is a Certified Wellness Coach ( ICF), Interior Design Consultant, and owner of Larkspur Wellness. She offers women's retreats, virtual interior design sessions, contract and contract-free coaching sessions, and online courses. She regularly contributes to Larkspur's blog and resides in Bend, OR. If you're interested in a session with Allison, visit: http://www.larkspurwellness.com/coaching